« "Accused of Racism" | Main | Offensive jargon comes under fire »

The Difference between Liberals, Conservatives and Texans

Question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two
small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife
comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40 and you are
an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your
family. What do you do?

Liberal Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the
man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would
inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What
about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock
the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I
carrying a loaded gun and what kind of message does this send to
society and my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing
me? Does he definitely want to kill me or would he just be content to
wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get
away while he was stabbing me? This is all so confusing! I need to
debate this with some friends for a few days to try to come to a
conclusion.
_________________________________________________________

Conservative Answer:

BANG!

__________________________________________________________________

Texan's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds
of reloading).

Wife: "Sweetheart, he looks like he's still moving, what do you kids
think?"

Son: "Mom's right Dad, I saw it too..."

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click....
(sounds of reloading).

Daughter: "Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"

Comments

the Glock is OK, but what about a SMLE No.4, mounting the old sword bayonet........
"They don't like it up 'em"

A REAL Texan wouldn't use those old-fashioned Silvertips.

Not when he can get Hydra-Shoks or SXTs...

Of course, my bedside revolver carries Silvertips, but then again, I'm not a real Texan.

I have had the occasion (no details) to see the results of Silvertips (in a morgue), and let me tell you, the wounds they inflict are extremely old-fashioned.