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The official Great Britons of 2004

The Telegraph presents a list of contenders for some Great Britons award and I have tried to help you identify them - not being a proper journalist I couldn't be arsed to do any research - but I think I have got them right (if not apologies).

Sir Bill Morris - last of the Trade Union leaders and black so gets the Guardian vote.
John Peel - Dead Disc Jockey so gets middle age trendy nostalgic for punk vote.
Lord Deedes - Reporter who is very old - gets nobody's vote.
Ken Loach - Arty film maker - luvvies vote.
Philip Pullman - writer of teenager books - but they won't vote.
Sir Simon Rattle - wild haired conductor - gets bus users vote.
Sir Tim Berners-Lee - Geek candidate - but is old news now.
Roger Penrose - sued toilet paper makers for using his patented pattern - ubergeek vote.
Jane Goodall - cuddly chimp botherer - gets the Ahhh! vote.
Benjamin Zephaniah - black poet - gets the Hackney vote.
Jane Tomlinson - Should know but don't.
Matthew O'Connor - No idea.
Gurinder Chadha - No idea but can guess whose vote this person will get.
Sir Tim Berners-Lee - Haven't we have had him already?
Lord Foster - Trendy architect - Gherkins and Bridges. Dahling vote.
Lord Browne - Sorry mate - don't know who you are.
Sir Paul Smith - a clothes cutter another Dahling vote.
Perween Warsi - from Star Wars?
Ellen MacArthur - has to sail around the world on her own probably because of personal hygiene issues. Transatlantic sailors vote.
Kelly Holmes - runner or jumper - gets the sporting vote.
Tanni Grey-Thompson - another runner or jumper but in a wheelchair so gets the sympathy sports vote.

Comments

Jane Tomlinson is the 40 something lady with terminal cancer who does many amazing sporting feats that those of us in tip-top health rather than extreme pain would have huge trouble with. Marathons, triathlons and this year she cycled from Rome to Home (in Leeds I think). I really couldn't care less about this poll but if I had to vote it'd probably be for her. - Although wasn't the pilot of spaceship one British? What about him?

Lord Browne? Head of BP. Gets the shirtlifter vote for a fairly obvious reason.

how come you didnt figure on this list, Mr E???

I vote for myself. Simply because I represent my interests better than anybody else. Though Penrose or Berners-Lee would probably get my vote in the geek capacity.

Substitute Pratchett for Pullman and then you'll have a writer worth reading.

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