« Spluttering into my port | Main | Your local tax money going down the pan. »

Hello Hello Hello - you're nicked.

Telegraph | News

Police are to be given sweeping powers to arrest people for every offence, including dropping litter, failure to wear a seat belt and other minor misdemeanours.
The measures, which come into force on Jan 1, are the biggest expansion in decades of police powers to deprive people of their liberty.
At present, officers can generally arrest people if they suspect them of committing an offence which carries at least five years in prison. They will now have the discretion to detain someone if they suspect any offence and think that an arrest is "necessary".

Hazel Blears, the Home Office minister, said: "It is vital that the police are equipped with the powers they need to enable them to do their jobs properly and effectively. The powers need to be updated to reflect modern policing priorities and the changing nature of criminal activity.

The only reason criminal activity is changing is because nuLabour have brought in 5300 new arrestable offences in the last few years! Liberty is becoming an absent friend we should remember on New Year's Eve.

As I said before:

Is it me or are we sinking into Third World standards of justice. Of course it is hard to convict people, especially clever people of crimes. That is the whole bloody point otherwise we end up like Constable Savage....

"Come in, shut the door."
"Yes, sir."
"Now then, Savage, I want to talk td you about some charges that you've been bringing lately. I think that perhaps you're being a little
over-zealous."
"Which charges did you mean then, sir?"
"Well, for instance this one: 'Loitering with intent to use a pedestrian crossing.' Savage, maybe you're not aware of this, but it is not illegal to use a pedestrian crossing, neither is 'smelling of foreign food' an offence."
"Are you sure, sir?"
"Also, there's no law against 'Urinating in a public convenience or 'Coughing without due care and attention."'
"If you say so, sir..."
"Yes, I do say so, Savage! Didn't they teach you anything at training school?"
"Erm, I'm sorry, sir..."
"Some of these cases are just plain stupid: 'Looking at me in a funny way' - Is this some kind of joke, Savage?"
"No, sir."
"And we have some more here: 'Walking on the cracks in the pavement,' 'Walking in a loud shirt in a built-up area during the hours of darkness,' and 'Walking around with an offensive wife.' In short, Savage, in the space of one month you have brought one hundred and seventeen ridiculous, trumped-up and ludicrous charges."
"Yes, sir."
"Against the same man, Savage."
"Yes, sir."
"A Mr Winston Kodogo, of 55, Mercer Road."
"Yes, sir."
"Sit down, Savage."
"Yes, sir."
"Savage, why do you keep arresting this man?"
"He's a villain, sir."
"A villain..."
"And a jail-bird, sir."
"I know he's a jail-bird, Savage, he's down in the cells now! We're holding him on a charge of 'Possession of curly black hair and thick lips."'
"Well - well, there you are, sir."
"You arrested him, Savage!"
"Thank you, sir."
"Savage, would I be correct in assuming that Mr Kodogo is a coloured gentleman?"
"Well, I can't say I've ever noticed, sir."
"Stand up, Savage! - Savage, you're a bigot. It's officers like you that give the police a bad name. The press love to jump on an instance like this, and the reputation of the force can be permanently tarnished. Your whole time on duty is dominated by racial hatred and petty personal vendettas. Do you get some kind of perverted gratification from going around stirring up trouble?"
"Yes, sir."
"There's no room for men like you in my force, Savage. I'm transferring you to the S.P.G. -"
"Thank you very much, sir."
"- Now get out!"

from: Not! The Nine O'Clock News, Hedgehog Sandwich, BBC Records REB 421,1981

Comments

If 'walking around with an offensive wife' was a crime, half the population of Hanwell would get nicked.

Generations of politicians have dreamed of criminalising the public to such an extent that gives them total control of the people. Now a huge database of photographs, DNA, and biometric profiles can quickly be built up so that the government police can truly say "We know who you are and we know where you live". Orwell and "Animal Farm", Aldous Huxley and "Brave New World" describe what lies ahead. And all three main parties are in cahoots with this vision. Did you really think the conservatives (Neo socialists) would save you?

Except of course Mr W Kodogo is perfectly safe. Along with Mr Mustapha Aziz he's deemed culturally incapable of even thinking naughty thoughts.

No, it'll be poor old Joe Normal who hgets it in the neck as Plod, racing to beat yet more Whitehall targets, plucks the low hanging fruit. I mean, he's only human; why spend dys looking for a burglar when the streets are full of people loitering with intent to break one of NuLab's regulations or other.

Don't be too quick to knock the Thrid World. Our cops may be so bloody useless they don't even leave the station any more (that is if they turn up for work at all) but it does mean us civilians can go about our lives in peace. Burglars get shot. Methinks the UK could do with some of that sort of Third World policing.

RM

Post a comment