The Government's latest crap idea
The Times has learnt that Margaret Beckett, the Environment Secretary, is to produce detailed codes of conduct telling pet owners how to feed their animals and where they should go to the toilet, (for instance the cat code says "Ensure that cats’ preference for privacy is met by giving them a hidden away place with cat litter to relieve themselves. This advice forms part of a nine-point guide for “going to the toilet”.
Every domesticated animal will have a code of conduct tailored to their species, each of which is expected to run into dozens of pages. This will form part of the Animal Welfare Bill, expected to clear Parliament in the next few months.
"Going to (the) Toilet" Aaargh! It is bad enough the semi-literate helpers at schools teaching my children such foul words but when people start talking about animals "going toilet" my gorge rises and the blood starts hammering at the back of forehead.
There is a small dinner party set I have been banned from when a charming woman (who seems to have forgiven me) mentioned her horse going to the toilet, "Horses stale" I shouted before descending into scatological drivel. I have shifted more tons of animal muck than you have had hot dinners, animals stale, piss, shit, crap, dung, poo, go to the bog... - all decent Saxon words - only our poncy Norman overlords witter on about toilets and lavatories.
Oh, and the rest of the idea is as daft as box of frogs, talking of which I will be interested in the codes they produce for frogs and lobsters....