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You probably think this song is about you

Real men straighten their hair - Men's style - Times Online

Whenever I walk into the gym I get a twinge of paranoia as I pass another Lâ Oréal advert that states: "You think you look the business, she thinks you look overworked?". Do I have too many wrinkles under my eyes? Will the pretty girls stop talking to me if my hair is not perfect? Should I buy some more moisturiser? Perhaps I should take my father's advice and be a "real bloke"...
When I arrived at university, I chose to blow some of my student loan and go to Toni and Guy. Surely they could solve my problems? When I walked out of the salon, my hair looked great, but when I woke up the next day it was back to resembling a bramble bush.

Frustrated yet again, I returned to the salon and asked how the stylists had achieved such a miraculous transformation of my hair the day before. They told me to purchase a pair of hair straighteners....
The routine I go through, usually twice a day, takes around half an hour. First, I wash my hair — two lots of shampoo and one of conditioner — and then I blow-dry my hair while carefully holding a towel across my fringe. If I do not do this, my fringe puffs up and is impossible to style.

After finishing my fringe, I straighten the sides and then do the main body of my hair. In the summer, I even have to position a fan so that I don’t start to sweat, as moisture makes the hair curl again. I have to be careful not to be in the direct line of the fan, though, as a gust of air can ruin the whole process...
we wear women’s jeans. The reason for this is our slight builds; it can be a nightmare to find jeans to fit our 28-inch waists. Also, women’s jeans generally have more interesting designs and are cheaper.

It can be embarrassing, at first, walking around the women’s section of jeans shops, but you soon get over it. I take pride in the fact that I can get into jeans that some of my ex-girlfriends could only dream of — I am a size 10 but can get into a size 8. Sweet.
I am worried that this article will make me sound vain,....

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The Times also in the same section profiles another man:


JOHN CAUDWELL: King of speed and economy- Times Online

Billionaires on a budget are thin on the ground, but John Caudwell is one. He not only cycles to work at manic pace, a 28-mile round trip from his Jacobean mansion on a bum-brutalising racing bike, but also cuts his own hair. "Why would I waste the time and pay somebody ten quid?" he once wondered.
He will probably still keep his bruiser-length bristle in shape with a powered clipper from Boots, despite selling his business, which includes the Phones4U mobile phone chain, for a sum that will give him £1.24 billion in cash.

Me - I'm a martyr to vanity - that's my skin care cream in the photo - and as to the hair? I washed it last week and it will get its post harvest cut soon....

Comments

I see that narcissism isn't dead then...

FYI I am saving on the haircuts too by growing mine down to my shoulders, just how I wanted to in the 70s.

Haircut ?.... I thought DEFRA had declared your bonce a SSSI

You guys still have hair?

Nothing wrong with your program of personal hygene in my book.

Then again I do have an aunt who clips her husbands locks twice a year, on the same day as she shears the sheepdogs. Then again Auntie R is also of the firm belief that horse linament is pretty much a universal cure all.

Oddly enough, while both she and Uncle R are pictures of robust health, she doesn't get many requests to write for magazines catering for the metrosexual population. Or the BMJ for that matter.

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