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Telegraph | News | The great Christmas standstill

Not having ventured far from the yule log burning in the hall I was wondering if one of my spotters could tell me how well the wind turbines are doing in helping supply the extra electricity that is needed on cold windless days like these....


The big fans are doing bugger all, just as in Summer when it's hot and still instead of cold and still.

However, if we rounded up all the obese people and connected a tread mill and some gearing we could solve the obesity epidemic and keep the lights on at the same time. Could also be extended to pensioners on ASBO's, keep 'em warm nicely.

If you want to see how wonderful these things are check out the biggest wind farm in Wales, (at the moment).

Cameron's much heralded windmill on his home has been taken down. Will someone ask him how much electricity it has produced to date, and whether this covers the energy cost of its manufacture?

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