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Glorious Tractor Production Figures Exceed Targets

Fall in crime rate defies the rise of knife culture - Times Online

The British Crime Survey (BCS), published today, will state that crime is falling in all 43 police forces in England and Wales and that the Government has exceeded its key target of cutting offences by more than 15 per cent since 2003. Its release comes at a time when the credibility of official statistics is being questioned.

You can say that again - what is that inflation rate?


Out walking the dog the other night I saw a police car - a miracle in itself. I assumed that the reason it was driving down the dead end road was because of the music emanating from a block of flats off the road that could be heard from half a mile away at 11:30pm. But no, they drove down the road, did a three point turn and drove off again leaving the no doubt delighted neighbours to endure a night of shit music at 3 million decibels. If they can't be arsed to get out of their cars once in a while, they could at least drive around with their windows open so they can hear the late night loud music, the gangs of feral kids shouting and the ponced up chav-mobiles using the road around the housing estate to re-enact scenes from the Fast and the Furious.

Well, knives - yes, including cooking and some table ("steak") ones - may yet be banned:

Dr Beckett ... says that long pointed knives will not always be replaced by similarly fatal weapons. He cites an unintended effect of the switch from coal gas to non-toxic North Sea gas: fewer suicides.

Non-toxic? So is nitrogen, ask any skin diver.

But yes (and skin divers pay special attention), there may actually be a bit of reason on the outer edges of banning knives:

The American made weapon is sold to hunters and divers and injects the frozen ball that expands to the size of a basketball at 850psi when the small handle-mounted trigger is pressed.

Yeah, that sounds fatal.

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