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Al Gore's Emission Problem

Al Gore behaved like 'crazed sex poodle' with masseuse - Telegraph
The woman, who recalled telling Mr Gore he was behaving like a "crazed sex poodle", claims he pinned her to his bed and forcibly French kissed her.

A French kissing sex poodle? I can't think of any lower insults, I must remember the reuse it.

He "flipped me flat on my back and threw his whole body face down over atop me, pinning me down and outweighing me by quite a bit".
The woman said Mr Gore provided a "dramatic display of violent temper as well as [an] extremely dictatorial, commanding attitude besides his smiley, global warning concern persona".
Having squirmed out of his grasp, she fled his suite. She claimed she later found stains on the front of her trousers and kept them uncleaned as evidence, believing they were his body fluids.

I think I'm going to upchuck.

Of course it is important to point out that Saint Al denies everything and Plod didn't find sufficient evidence to press charges. Maybe it was a really really small stain...

Comments

:-)

You Sir have won my Kudos on the title of this one...

Love that sense of humor (humour)

vince
Maine U.S.A.

"Al Gore" and "sex" in the same sentence.

No erections for a week. Thank you very much.

Frank Zappa would have loved all this!

Apart from the references to poodles and sex (as per his song "Dirty Love") there's the link to Tipper Gore (who was opposed by Frank at the hearings which resulted in the obligation to classify albums according to their 'suitability' for young persons). And since Big Al himself is not much different to a televangelist (another of the Zappa targets) Frank could have got a whole new album out of this.

"Having squirmed out of his grasp, she fled his suite. She claimed she later found stains on the front of her trousers and kept them uncleaned as evidence, believing they were his body fluids."

Yikes! Upchuck is the right word.

As one of my colonels was wont to say after a long and tedious briefing: "Thank you, that was much more information than I needed."

Had he only hired the right woman for the job, there would be no, er... issue. Well, in fact there would have been but that would be part of her job.

However, he being a hipocritical little scum bag, he wouldn't do the right thing and hire the right woman for the job. He wanted to delude himself, as usual, that he was God's Gift. And, also, thought that $300 per hour was too much.

Us mere mortals can hire professional women without a qualm. His God Giftness could not. Is this going to be his personal Calvary? If this silly story gets traction, I expect to see Gore on TV stating precisely that, and that it is his cross to Poly Bear in his fight to save the planet.

Got that girls? Sex with Al Gore saves the planet!!

BTW Ladies: Sex with me not only saves the entire universe, it makes he Earth move :-)

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